I have been waiting for this moment for exactly 2,226 days…
…ever since that fateful day in July of 2006 when I peed on a stick and discovered the light at the end of the tunnel was not as close as I had previously thought.
And now, instead of dancing a jig and wailing “FREEEEEEDOM” a la William Wallace over Mimosas with my girlfriends, I am rocking in the fetal position and smelling the tags of Bucket Head’s comfort turtle, wondering where the past 5 and 1/2 years went and if I can talk The Gatekeeper into reversing his vasectomy.
So really, please look away. There is nothing to see here today.
But if you need a good hearty belly laugh, please go visit my beloved blogging sister Kim at Let Me Start by Saying. She has chronicled in brilliantly graphic detail one of my least favorite moments from BlogHer ’12. It is an absolute must read.
Yours truly, and missing my baby,